...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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