Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.

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(575): View more from New Mexico

We need to talk about our relationship.

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?

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(317): View more from Indiana

If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.

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27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(510): View more from California

It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.

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(229): View more from Georgia

My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.

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(845): View more from New York

I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try

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(651): View more from Minnesota

these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"

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(513): View more from Ohio

All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.

(740): View more from Ohio

Magyver!

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