We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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