youre lurking in front of me
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
