Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
