So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Someone stole a lamp last night.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize