He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
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