2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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