I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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