we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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