is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize