so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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