Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize