Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
