In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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