It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
