dude i'm inner monologue high
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
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