We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
