so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize