I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Randomize
