Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
