honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
