Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize