I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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