Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize