I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
whose ass print is on the piano?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
