Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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