The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Randomize