Banned from zoo.
Again?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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