I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Randomize
