it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
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yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
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My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize