***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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