I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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