you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
