This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
