how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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