i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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