You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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