fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
