Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
