so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
