sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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