dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Randomize
