i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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