Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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