wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
