How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize