mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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