So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
My vagina is very pro this idea
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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