is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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