I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
